I was black-eyed-bucky. I'm a socially akward Biologist from the Netherlands. Strange rant posts are my jam. Give me weird facts, animals and beautiful art and Im happy.
They kill and eats flamingos as well as anything else they can fit in their giant mouths. They eat fecal matter. They eat crocodiles. They eat trash out of dumpsters. They’ve eaten shoes. They’ll attack you if you don’t give them your shoe. They have no natural predators besides MAYBE lions and some parasitic nematodes. There is something deeply wrong with them.
VERSUS
Flamingo (family Phoenicopteridae)
They’re extremophiles! They live in the most boiling acidic water and they do not give a shit! They drink, nest in, and live in boiling, hypersaline, toxic water that will strip a human’s skin away! And they’re pink!
They have a horn for no discernible reason that breaks off and grows back, have wing spurs for fighting, their skin CRACKLES when touched because they have air bubbles under there, and yes, they scream.
VERSUS
Great Potoo (Nyctibius grandis)
They look like a muppet, they sound like a sad trumpet crying for its’ mother, are little more than a flying mouth and eyes. One of the staples of weird looking birds.
Asexuals were always part of pride and it really fucking shows when people think it’s a recent term.
Although not going by the term “asexual” yet, asexuality was spoken about alongside homosexuality as far back as the 1890s. Asexual history is just as vital to queer history as any other term and I’m so tired of watching us being treated like a new thing
pokemon loves just straight up lying about things so much. “this is binkabonkus one swipe of its claws can cut down an entire forest” and then its claws do like 12 damage
not even just stats either “the glowing bulb on bulbanjo’s head is brighter than the sun” and you can clearly see it isnt.
Magcargo
hold on i dont actually know that many pokemon let me look something up
no part of that is how physics works let alone biology
girls go to college to get a degree in a program that they were once excited for but have since had all the enjoyment sucked out of it and is no longer a baseline requirement in an increasingly competitive and demanding workforce
My father would, at one point, buy knives from a man with a prosthetic leg, made out of wood. Might seem strange to buy knives from a knife salesman instead of a store, but this was company level and they needed a supplier of scalpels or something. Anyway, this guy would bring out a knife, show it, talk about it and then stab the knife into his thigh while continuing to hold a normal conversation. Only mentioning that he had a wooden leg once the customer jumped out of the chair in shock.
I’ve seen people complain about Gwen saying to her dad “you’re a good cop” but I don’t think they understand what that scene actually means. Gwen’s dad is supposed to represent the “good cop”. It’s like Gwen says: he puts on that badge everyday so someone worse than him doesn’t. Pre Gwen’s reveal, he SEEMS like a good person, advocating for bringing peter’s killer to justice. But then he finds out, and in that moment, values the law over his teenage daughter. He even shows it in their reconciliation scene, even after not seeing his daughter for MONTHS, by arguing against Gwen being a vigilante despite the all the good shes done. When Gwen says “you’re a good cop,” she’s not saying “youre a good person” or “youre a good dad”. She’s saying “youre a BAD person. You’re a BAD dad. you value the law over my life, no matter what I do. You’re willing to sacrifice me for what you assume is the greater good, but it’s not even that.”
Lying to children is fun when they know you are being ridiculous. When you hold up a carrot like “guys look at this huge Cheeto” and they all scream “NOOOOOOOOO that’s a CARE-OTT!”
“What? No, it’s my giant Cheeto.”
“NOOOOOOO!”
When I was a camp counselor a fellow counselor claimed that any silly camp song we sang was “his next hit single” and we should all follow him on SoundCloud and he stuck by this daily and it never ceased to amuse both the adults and the children.
When children are small and learning to count and you say the numbers out of order? Peak comedy.
“How many toys are there? Let’s see… oneeee, twooo, six!”
“NO! One two three!”
“What? Are you sure? Let me try again. One, two… six?”
“Noooooo!”
Once reduced a toddler into a fit of giggles by singing “A B C D E F Q.”
on Halloween at the store i work at there was a little boy in a Batman costume, and as I was helping his mom I kept addressing him as Mr. Superman and Mr. Aquaman & he kept correcting me, “noooo, BATMAN” until they were leaving and he very seriously told me, “actully, I’m Ryan”
